Experiencing Fear!!
If you have been diagnosed with CRPS, then to some point you have experienced fear. When something like CRPS affects your life there are all kinds of fears that one experiences, and you can’t tell me anything different. What effects most people I think though is fear of the unknown. When I was first diagnosed I had no idea as to what this meant to me and my future. There was a terror deep down inside, because nobody could tell me what things were going to be like for me. Will I move my hand again? Will I be able to pay the mortgage next month? Do I have the courage inside to do what it takes to overcome what has happened to me? These are all kinds of questions that I had to face, and each one of them scared me to death. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t struggle with each of these questions. It’s a matter of having faith that God is going to take care of all those questions!
As I’ve been dealing with my CRPS over the last six years I’ve had to face more fears than I can honestly remember. Over the course of time I’ve been able to gain strength as each new fear arises. I can honestly say that my faith has been tested over and over, and every time God replaces that fear with courage and a desire to overcome. I’ve had to learn that carrying anxiety over each new fear that comes up only makes my pain worse, so now I try to relax the best I can as I deal with whatever the issue might be.I take each day one day at a time and I trust that God will help me in the areas that I need help.
One of the biggest fears I’ve had to endure is in the area of finances. When all of this started I had a job that payed well, and my wife was able to stay home with the kids. Well just like that we went to living on half of one income. I didn’t know how we were going to get by. It became a matter of trusting God for provision, because there was no way we were going to be able to make it without His help. This was a real source of fear yet every time finances were needed they have been provided. Fear in this case gave way to trust.
My point is that you are going to encounter fears along the way as you fight your battle along the way. It’s how you choose to face those fears that’s going to be the difference. You can either face them head on and deal with them, or you can suppress them and let them slowly eat at you from the inside out. Better yet you can have faith that God will help you with them!