Did you detect that today I might also be a bit on the irritable side. This isall part of the world that I have come to know. I’m not going to be happy every day, and I want people to see that it’s ok to have your bad days. Today is just one of those days where everything is to much! For those of you who don’t understand CRPS, have a little patience with us when you see that we are like this. Understand that my nervous system isn’t normal, and that right now things are spinning out of control. So when I’m short tempered or moody it might be because I’m having a bad day and that my nervous system is in overload. I just have to ask God to get those things under control.
It’s bad enough that I’m having a bad day all around, but the kids have also been fighting and when that happens it makes for a long day. I’m ready for a relaxing evening watching a good hockey game. If there is one good thing about my day today it’s that I get to watch my Vancouver Canucks play tonight. Yes! I’m a hockey fan and if something is going to bring a smile to my face tonight it’s watching the Canucks knock off Detroit! I’ve got a great big smile on my face already because Vancouver just scored to make it 1-0!!! Feeling better already!
In spite of hanging on by my finger nails tonight all is ok! I wish I could tell you that you aren’t going to have days like this when your fighting CRPS, but the truth is that your going to. I’d also be lying if I said that ever day was going to be easy. So yes if all of a sudden you feel a wave of emotion wash over you, and you feel the need to have a good cry let it happen. Some people will laugh at me when I say this but the truth is that we need that every now and then. This is an expression of our true emotions, so don’t be afraid to let that show.
Through all of this I’ve been able to learn things about myself, and I’m not afraid to let the real me show! There are going to be tough times where you just want to put on a brave face and suppress what’s really going on inside. Some people however think that it’s a weakness to show their emotions. I think that it takes a very strong person to show their true emotions, and not to be afraid of how others may perceive them. God created us to show our emotions! This is an area of my life where I think God has helped me to gain strength during all this.
It’s been a really long day and I’m done! On a positive note my Vancouver Canucks won the game 2-1. Things are looking up already!!!