Hi everybody! I’m back for yet another post, and at the same time trying to get ready to leave on our trip on Friday. It’s going to be nice to get away from the cold and snow for a while. It’s been snowing so much lately that we’re running out of space to pile up all the snow! Today my pain is trying to take over and I’m trying to keep myself distracted so that it doesn’t get out of control. Last night was one of those nights where I just couldn’t get any sleep. Every half hour the pain would remind me that it hadn’t left, waking me up time after time! It’s almost as if your body teases you into getting sleep, and just as your about to drift off into a peaceful sleep you feel shooting pain in your affected limbs. Once again you are left to try and get to sleep!
Anyway it wasn’t a great night last night and so I’m not having an easy day today. This week coming up is going to be crazy because not only are we going away but we also have my oldest daughters seventh birthday planned for tomorrow. Then the next day is her actual birthday, so for the next couple of days we will be packing and getting the house ready for my sister-in-law who will be moving in with the kids while we are gone. Then Fri&Sat are travel days so there will be quite a bit of stress over the next week. I can only hope that my pain doesn’t go in the wrong direction and get a whole lot worse. Then the relaxing can begin and I’m even hoping for a night or two of really good sleep while we are there.
I’m really hoping that while we are away that I will get some relief from the pain. My episodes with not only my pain but also my head have been pretty intense lately. There is still no news as to when I might be going in for my surgery for the spinal implant, but in my mind any time would be a great time to go in. As much as I don’t want the surgery, I don’t want the pain either so it’s a catch twenty-two. Each day that I get up I ask God to help me through that day, and to give me the strength to get to the next. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts God really is the only way that I could get through each day, and have the strength to push forward. It seems of late that I’ve gained a strength to take this disease head on, and I know that it’s God that has given me that strength.
It seems as if it is only getting easier to handle this disease. It isn’t me however that’s making things easier it’s God. Through everything that my family and I have been through there has always been some kind of a tieback to God. In some way, God has always been there to take care of our needs. It took a while but I had to learn to have faith in ever area of need, and that God would be there to provide. Some areas this was easier than others, but I continued to stand in faith. As time has gone He has raised up my confidence making things much easier to deal with. As we deal with CRPS we often say that nobody understands and only those living with CRPS could understand. Nothing could be farther from the truth, because God is always thinking about you and I. Even when times are really tough you need to have the faith that He can provide whatever you need. As time goes by I know that my faith is only getting stronger, and its getting easier to stand in faith when I’m faced with circumstances that are beyond my control.
As I go away on this trip I feel as though I’m going to be doing some things that I haven’t done in a very long time. As I mentioned in an earlier post I want this to be a trip with no restrictions. So I’m going to be attempting things that I haven’t been able to do for a while. I look forward to being able to post the pictures of me doing those things when I get back!! I might even write a post while we are away. So for now I say goodbye! Wish me luck as I start a week filled with chaos and that my pain doesn’t get to out of control.